I heard we made out
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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