Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
this must be what syphilis tastes like
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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