he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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