A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
