Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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