The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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