her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
