Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
