Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
