I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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