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• (252): View more from North Carolina

  I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point

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  These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.

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  The 33 Worst Things Men Have Said While Hitting On Women

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..

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• (607): View more from New York

  I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.

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• (620): View more from Kansas

  If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.

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