nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Randomize
