I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize