I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
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