I like to think it a success when the cops are called
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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