Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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