guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
