I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
