The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize