God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
