you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
