Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
