I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
