did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
