if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
is wine microwaveable?
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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