butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize