He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
