maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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