I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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