Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize