Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
