Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize
