I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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