I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
