we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
