Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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