Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
