my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
It's never too late to be topless.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
