Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
