I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
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