If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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