I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
