vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
