Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
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U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
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Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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