I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
My butt remains clenched, sir.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
