1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I will be naked everywhere
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
