she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Just pee around me
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Randomize
