he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Sorry about my life...
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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