just tell him i said nine months
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
