go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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