haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
