I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
