Where are you?
In a non slutty way
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize